12 Things You Need To Know About Arranged Marriages

Arranged marriages are not that bad. There are few things that need proper focus and research before giving a thumbs up for arranged marriage. Well, according to all the research and advices that I have garnered till yet about arranged marriages is that you have to compromise 40% with all your highly expected criterions. Don’t worry you people are not alone as you and me are on the same ride thinking, wondering, getting confused and scared about going for an arranged marriage.

I have come up with some real facts and things that everyone should know about arranged marriages and will be sharing some of the common thoughts and reactions that probably could make rounds in your mind. So, here we go..

1. Self analysis

This is what you need to do, when you get the first notice of getting married. All you need to do is make a list of your expectations and criterions that you need in your future spouse. Round up that are top essential factors and get marked those criterions with which you could compromise if needed.

2. Looks

This is first thing where you have to compromise with your expectation. Getting a picture of your “arranged future spouse” and totally getting messed up with the looks and appearance is somewhat normal. But the thing is here looks and appearance has to take a back seat. You rarely could get a partner like Jason Statham or John Abraham. Looks are important but not that essential part of arranged marriage.

3. Age

Age, weight and height are mere figures which never affects true love. Yeah it is, but in arranged marriages you really need to take care of age factor which is essential for getting better understanding and compatibility. The most preferred age difference in arranged marriage is 6 years because age differences could create different opinions, views, conflicts etc. And the right age to get married for a girl is 25-26 and for a guy is 29-30. However, these days this factor is quite being ignored most of the time.

4. Low expectations

Never expect anything as life is unexpected. Expectations do hurt. Running real high on your expectations could end you up in a devastating situation. Always try to keep your expectations low and decent. Because it is not that possible to meet all your expectations in one person.

Recommended: 10 Commendable Reasons To Pick Arranged Marriages

5. Background research

This is the most important thing to know and to do as marriage is a big decision of your life and you have the rights to be perfectly assured about your future spouse and in-laws family. You can’t just blindly put the varmala (marriage garland) on your spouse, or say qubool hai (I accept) or say I do on the wedding day. So, better check your spouse family, background in details.

6. Financial compatibility

Every parent wants their daughter to be in safe hands where she would not have to adjust with financial security. Be bold and straight when it comes to economic compatibility.  

7. Understanding

Yeah, I know it’s too weird and tough to know the better understanding with mere 1-2 meetings. As it takes lifetime to understand someone better and even the entire life seems too less. You could share your feelings with your friends, or siblings about this topic. But I suggest, for better understanding ask for your would be’s number to start a decent conversation or you could simply ping them on social network sites.

Recommended: Prospective Questions For Every Bride & Groom Before Arranged Marriage

8. Get advice

Advices before arranged marriages from the experienced persons or some real intelligent beings could be very much helpful. Let them guide you with right advices and tips but make sure that only after being sure from your spouse’s end about the marriage you will be sharing your fear, concerns and feelings with your friends or siblings.

9. Imagine

To get a yes from your heart and mind you have to visualize that person as your spouse, living with him/her, imagining all situations and understanding your mind’s and heart’s reaction to this. If it’s positive then you could give a thumbs up.

10. Compromise

Before arranged marriage set up your mind for few compromises and adjustments, because as I said before arranged marriages come up with 40% compromises for sure. You will have to live according to their family views, routines, style and many more. So, be ready.

11. Commitment

Commitment is all that work for arranged marriages. Never feel pressurized, take your own time to declare your decision only when you are sure about your commitment level or being committed to that person. Moreover, you also find out your future spouse’s commitment level for you.

Recommended: 5 Things About Marriage That Indian Women Are Scared Of

12. Finale decision

At the end of this process, let me tell you that only you have to spend your rest of the life with that person. Your family, friends will be the side and supporting factors but there will be only two players. So, never ever marry or say yes to a guy/girl just because your parents and relatives want you to. It’s your life and should be your decision, because no one wants a real messed up marriage life ruined only because of mere a wrong decision.