Relationship Wrestle: Why Fights Break Out in Your Relationship

Do you ever wonder why relationship troubles are so common?

Why do the smallest things cause big blowout fights between you and your significant other?

Usually, when you’re fighting about the small stuff, it’s a symptom of a bigger issue. Something else is going wrong in the relationship, and all the bickering is actually the problem coming to the surface.

So, why does this happen? And what can you do about it?

Let’s explore.

Here are some reasons why fights break out in any relationship.

Communication breakdown

Every relationship has ups and downs. And if yours is in a downturn, it’s likely because of a communication breakdown.  

Is there a topic you’re avoiding? Maybe it’s something you’ve talked about before and didn’t come to a resolution. Many couples try to sweep these issues under the rug, but they’ll come out eventually. It’s usually in the form of an argument.

Unrealistic expectations

Almost all arguments come down to one thing: Unmet expectations. We expect our partners to act a certain way. We expect them to know what we want without telling them. And then we’re disappointed when they prove that they know no such thing.

Imagine you’ve wanted nothing more than a brand-new Passat. And your partner calls to tell you he’s on his way home from the dealership. Your mind races. Finally, you’ve got your new Passat. You’re so lucky to have a partner that’s so in tune with your needs.

And then he shows up… in a certified preowned VW Jetta.

You’re deflated. Sure, it’s a nice car, but he should have known better.

But in this case, your partner didn’t cause the problem. It was your expectations. You’re now angry because your partner didn’t meet the ideas you had in your head.

If you can learn to let go of expectations, you will be much happier as a couple and as a person.

How to avoid fights in your relationship

Before we get to the heart of this conversation, let’s address the elephant in the room. You cannot avoid all fights in your relationship. You’re going to wake up feeling grumpy and snap at your partner. It happens. But these tips will help you avoid most fights in your relationship.

Stay positive

Look on the bright side of things as often as possible. You’re in this relationship for a reason. Focus on the positive points that brought you there and try to appreciate the good in the person you’re with.

Practice forgiveness

Everyone makes mistakes. Even you. That’s why it’s important to forgive your partner when he or she messes up. Now, you may consider some mistakes unforgivable, and that’s okay. Know what they are, and let your partner know that the line has been crossed. If you’re not willing to forgive, it’s probably time to move on.

Don’t expect a perfect relationship because it doesn’t exist. But you can work to make the relationship you have as perfect for you as possible. Some arguing is inevitable. The key is to work through your differences as quickly and efficiently as possible.