How To Let Go Of Your Insecurities In Your Relationship?

Feeling insecure and jealous in a relationship is a sign of true love. But too much of anything is bad. Too much insecurity in a relationship could create misunderstanding, arguments and conflicts that are never good for any relationship. Your love for your partner would be no doubt true but your insecurities could kill your relationships terribly. Insecurity ruins relationships as it makes people clingy which creates all problem. Your insecurities will sprout suspicious behaviour in you, doubts and negative thoughts in your mind and most importantly your trust level regarding the relationship would start degrading slowly. So, it becomes very much essential to get rid of insecurities in your relationship to get a happy and peaceful married life. Here are few ways to let go of your insecurities.

Stop getting confused between imagination and reality

The reality is the guy sitting next to you on the waiting lounge at the airport is just trying to talk to you and the imagination is that guy is a suicide bomber, or a terrorist or one of the plane hijackers. So, whenever you get clouded by your negative and unhealthy imaginations try to avoid those by getting busy somewhere else more important because non-sense confusions could ruin your relationship for no reason.

Stop thinking it is only about you

Stop being self-centred at every subject. If your spouse doesn’t want to go out, that may be due to his/her headache or stress, or too much work load. Don’t assume that it’s because of you or your spouse feels low to go out with you and all bullshit. Don’t misunderstand your partner’s silence and never ask consistently the reason of his/her silence.

Avoid negative thoughts

The most common reasons of insecurities in your relationship are the negative thoughts. Negative thoughts can give rise to negative imaginations, doubts, confusions and conflicts. So, better stop focusing on negative beliefs and ideas. Be more positive and try to get positive perception towards your life. There is no such prefect relationship in this world because perfect has no existence without imperfect. In fact imperfection is beautiful and accepting it life could be more beautiful.

Stop reading minds

Almost every relationship’s problems are associated with social anxieties which start with bad communication, which leads to attempted mind reading.  Mind reading occurs when two people presume that they know what the other is thinking but actually they don’t. This entire process of guessing, wondering and trying to find out what someone is thinking leads to insecurity and stress.

Avoid getting stressed out

Too much of worrying over little things, getting irritated on small matters and getting stress over some issues even could lead you to negative thoughts which could create a bad illusion regarding your relationship as a result of which you will end up feeling suspicious and unsure about your spouse’s activities creating insecurity in your mind.

Avoid extra baggage of previous relationship

Every relationship undergoes some rough patches which are normal. If anything goes wrong you might end up with break up. But one failure in a relationship doesn’t means that the next relationship will be the same or will face the situations. So, it’s better to forget your past relationships. The reasons why your previous relationship ended, your partner’s weird attitude and all such bad memories are called the extra baggage which you should never carry with you for your entire life. Those memories keep haunting you and starts establishing its roots which give rises to insecurities in your relationship.

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Stop looking at things in one way

Changing your perception will change your life definitely. Looking at things in a black and white mode restricts positive and good thoughts. If you feel defensive when you are blamed by someone, it’s totally natural that when you blame or point out something wrong with your partner, he/she will become defensive. It’s natural human tendency. So, change your way of looking at things and issues, be easy and compassionate with your approach.

Stop being paranoid over everything

Most relationship issues and associated social stress initiates with bad communication and conversation, which makes couple to read their spouses’ minds.  Being too much suspicious about your partner on his/her every single spoken word and actions makes you think, ‘Why he said this?’ ‘She is no more interested in me, I guess.’ ‘May be she is planning to get divorce.’ Such uncertain thoughts start taking rounds on your mind when you start being paranoid which only creates more misunderstanding, confusions and insecurities.

Give room to your relationship to breathe

What I am talking about is ‘SPACE’. When you sow a seed you give it space to germinate and sprout to tiny leaves to branches, then a flower. Similarly, space and patience is very important in a relationship to let it breathe properly. Giving enough space makes relationship stronger and will gradually reduces your insecurities.

Talk directly instead experimenting

Don’t pull your relationship with ignored communications that you wanted to but never because you are wondering and assuming all non-existing negative thoughts. Rather sit with your spouse with cool and calm mind to talk directly but smoothly about the issues that is bothering you. It is better to make things transparent instead making it over-cluttered.

Stop expecting a perfect relationship

Expecting a perfect relationship will end you up in spending your entire life hopelessly looking for the right lover and the right partner if you expect them to be perfect.  This process will drive you mad gradually, as you feel more and more unsatisfied with every failed relationship that didn’t made up to your expectation which only sprouts more and more insecurities in your relationship.

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Avoid conflicts over non-existing subjects

Constant pushing yourself and your partner to baseless brawls and fights could lead you nowhere. It creates more confusion, misunderstandings and doubts for your partner in your mind and same happens with your spouse too. Result is as expected your relationship might get affected or even end up at session court.