Getting Over Dating Anxiety: a Few Valuable Tips
Life is full of stresses and unpredictable situations, and such an event as a first date is more than a serious occasion for excitement. But excessive nervousness can spoil the impression. How to overcome your dating anxiety? Here are four simple tips.
Positive attitude only
Don’t forget that for your companion, a date is also a pretty important event. They spend as much time preparing and worrying as you. Nevertheless, from women’s point of view, a date looks a bit simpler than men think. All it takes is a few simple steps and thorough preparation, and everything will go smoothly. But why men are so scared of going on dates?
In many ways, the wrong approach is to blame. Often, guys make a mistake in the attitude towards dating. Remember that it’s you who decides how everything goes. Much of the date depends on you. To get rid of the excitement, think about what advantages you have over the vast majority of your potential competitors. At first, you might think that you can’t offer anything. But if you take a better look, you’ll find a lot of things you can use to your advantage. For example, such qualities as kindness, caring, sense of humor. All these traits are highly appreciated among women, and you’ll stand out from the competition.
You must be in high spirits when the time of the date comes. You’re planning to have a good time, so why would the expectation of this event overshadow the pleasure? If you’re nervous, pamper yourself with something you like. It can be your favorite movie, pizza, or good music. Only you know what can raise your spirits.
Your partner is not perfect, too
Sometimes people are unobjective towards their companions, thinking they’re too good for them. Don’t be like that because you can ruin your expectations of the date, as well as the date itself. You should understand that your partner is just a simple person like you, who has her own shortcomings. You can even look them up if you want.
In addition, you make a big mistake by putting yourself below your companion’s level. Can a good person be characterized by moral weakness, low self-esteem, and uncertainty? No! You must be absolutely confident in your abilities to nail the date.
In modern society, it’s the man who must be the leader in all respects. Strong character is as attractive as outer beauty. So why don’t you show that you have one? Since you take on the task of being a leader, you’re free to control how the date goes.
Start with something smaller
If you’re afraid of the date because you don’t know what to say and how the companion will react to you, start with a small rehearsal. Go to some dating site chat with a couple of Russian chicks or Ukrainian girls. The hotter, the better. This will boost your confidence a bit.
Don’t start playing your conversation over in your head
Reflections on what could happen, or thoughts about your potential failure will only lead you to more anxiety. If you need to solve the problem, solve it as quickly as possible, without unwanted emotions and doubts. Psychologists call this approach a problem-focused solution. Instead of worrying about how you look, try to learn more about the person sitting in front of you.
Don’t follow the tips
Books and Internet are full of tips on what to do to attract attention. You can follow all of them if you want: dress properly, laugh at your companion’s jokes, keep telling funny stories non-stop, or watch the partner’s body language, but this doesn’t guarantee you success. Instead of worrying about how you look and what people think of you, try to learn more about the person you want to impress.
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