Does Intergenerational Dating Work? 

Generations. When someone says that word, it really feels like time has gone by so fast. For us to have so many generations ahead of us is only proof that this world has lived on for many millennia, nourishing life every step of the way. And how is life made? It’s made when two people come together in love and life and vow to create a new future together. I guess we can say that love is the creator of generations. It is by love that people of all kinds come into union. It is by love that this world continues to thrive. 

Love has many faces, you see. It doesn’t always show up in forms that get recognized instantly. Sometimes, it’s even covered in so many layers that it’s difficult to understand what you have up until you lose it. There are also times when we do recognize it but we’re still too afraid to admit it – especially when it’s not the normal kind of love.

Then again, is there even such a thing as normal love? 

When Is Love Normal?

Now, that’s kind of hard to answer, don’t you think? When people say “you can’t choose the person whom you’ll love” they sure are making a lot of sense. Love, the romantic kind that is, is not something we voluntarily give or feel about someone. We can’t dictate our hearts to adore one person or to fall out of love with another. It all happens naturally, organically perhaps. However, through time, I guess society has somewhat created “norms” for relationships. It has come up with standards and it’s as if anyone who does not abide by such standards would be seen as deviant, abnormal, or weird even. 

I think the most appropriate term to use would be “taboo.”

Different societies have different concepts of taboo love. In some societies, it is forbidden to marry off a girl under the age 18 even with parents’ consent. In other societies, however, a girl may be betrothed to a man, married even, at the young age of 5. Can you imagine that? 

Majority of the world believe in monogamous relationships, wherein a man must be wed to only one spouse. But some cultures and religion allow the union of one man to many wives or one woman to many husbands. Would you believe that a community in Tibet allows brothers to marry a single wife? And if you are the sole wife to these many brothers you are viewed with utmost respect and envy by other women? Read more about it here: https://www.thoughtco.com/polyandry-in-tibet-3528444. 

It’s crazy how one corner of the world would have completely different views about love and marriage than the other. But I guess at the end of the day, it is what makes things interesting. It is what makes communities unique.

One other taboo that is recognized by the majority of people is intergenerational love. You may or may not know about it already but we’ll discuss it all the same. 

What Is Intergenerational Love?

Intergenerational would mean the association of one generation to another; say the boomers to the millennials or the silent generation to the post millennials. Inter means between so it signifies a connection or relationship between one and another. I’m supposing you can guess where we’re going with this.

Intergenerational love, therefore, is the love shared between two unlikely individuals, separated by decades of experience. In other words, it’s a romantic affiliation between someone young and old. The difference in age may vary but when we say “intergenerational,” it would be safe to assume that the gap is at least 25 years – the birthing age of most women. This means that the couple in question may be a 20 year old and a 45 year old – or, the gap may be wider than that. It could even be between a 23 year old and a 74 year old. 

The gaps vary in every relationship but fact remains that intergenerational relationships have relatively wide age differences. In fact, the couple differs in age so much that the younger individual may even be viewed as the child or grandchild of his or her partner. I believe you can understand why it is considered taboo in many societies. 

Is Intergenerational Love Healthy?

If you’re a hopeless romantic, you would say that love knows no bounds and therefore should not be limited by people’s own beliefs and understanding of things. Love, after all, is something that defies all things. It is something that transcends all things so it shouldn’t be bound by societal standards of relationships and union. While this is all true and while love is beautiful in every way possible, I wouldn’t go as far as saying that intergenerational relationships are not without drawbacks. There are certain challenges intergenerational couples must face. 

One example is the difference in perception, the level of maturity of each individual. The older lover, having more experience in life and love, may find it difficult to keep up with the younger lover who is all about excitement and discovery and reckless actions. This gap in thinking can make the relationship very challenging and exhausting for both people involved and it usually leads to the fall-out of their love. But if you think that you can go above and beyond such trivialities, then maybe you can give intergenerational love a go, especially if you already have your eyes set on someone. If you don’t but you are interested about meeting someone, you can check out reviews for great intergenerational dating websites here. 

But in order to love greatly and fully, you have to be ready to defend your relationship at all times. Many people will try to put you down, after all. As I said, majority of people do not find this type of pairing flattering. But if you know in your heart that your love is real and that what you have goes beyond cheap gossip and controversies, then I’m sure you can find a way to make it work.