10 Tips To Stop Spanking And Start Effective Parenting

Not every child is same and neither is their upbringing. The toddler stage can be quite difficult to handle for parents and it is this stage when they need to be introduced to several good habits and basic understanding of the world. They have to be taught what not to do and how their actions can sometimes be unreasonable. 

Often parents at this stage come across situations when toddlers refuse to listen to them and parents just resort to spanking to convey that the demand is not right. This kind of spanking in order to discipline children especially in front of other people can have negative impact on children in the long run. 

Studies suggest that depression and low self-esteem are the most common outcomes found in people who had been spanked often in their childhood. But toddlers can be extremely naughty and active and may keep testing the patience of their parents. But being violent towards them is not a solution and can affect their tender minds in retrogressive manner. 

Handling toddler’s tantrums without spanking or getting rude is a knack that positive parenting is comprised of.

Here are 10 tips to stop spanking and start effective parenting through which you can form strategies to make your child more empathetic and understanding towards various day to day situations:

1. Let Your Toddlers Learn From Their Mistakes

This is probably a very logical tool for controlling bad behaviour on the part of toddlers. When your kid is denying to do something you asked, just don’t force them. Instead let them do whatever they want and then face the consequences as well. For instance, if you ask them to have their meal and they refuse to, don’t force-feed them. Just ensure that they don’t get snacks as well. By doing so, they will understand the importance of having meals during meal time.

2. Make Them Understand That You Are Angry Or Upset

This is one of the most effective tips to stop spanking and start effective parenting but requires you to be firm on your stand. When your kid is not behaving good, ensure that they understand with your behaviour that you are upset or angry. Be strict and tell them that you won’t play their favourite game together or will not do any fun activity with them if they don’t bring change in their behaviour. This will help your kid in learning to be sensitive towards others and control their actions.

3. Manage Their Demands Smartly

As parents, you know what cheers your child. Their favourite toy or game or any stuff that they love can be used to manage their bad behaviour. If they are demanding any new stuff, just tell them that if they want new one, they will have to get rid of the ones they love. This technique will help in controlling their behaviour and unwarranted demands.

4. Give Them Choices Instead Of Succumbing To Tantrums

When your child asks for a new toy or any stuff, instead of scolding them or refusing them upfront, just give them a choice. Ask them if they want the stuff now or on their birthday. Give them the power to make their choices and help them think logically. Tell them that they won’t get gifts if they buy the demanded stuffs now. This technique will compel them to make logical decisions and will gradually make them understand that making compromises can be quite helpful in future.

5. Implement The Time Out Method

Sometimes when parents get angry, children may negatively respond to the anger and instead of understanding why their parents are angry, they might give back answers or throw tantrums. So as a parent, you must understand that getting loud and angry always is not the solution. Try not to react and give them a time out. Better be strict and supervise their actions and they will eventually learn to calm down and behave in a better fashion.

6. Encourage Good Behaviour

Let your toddlers know that you appreciate their good behaviour. While you don’t tolerate bad behaviour, you must also not leave any opportunity in praising for good behaviour. This will eventually make children understand the difference between behaving good and bad.

7. Stop Paying Attention When Your Toddler Is Excessively Fussy

Your reaction is the one thing that toddlers demand when they get fussy. Try to ignore them and continue with your work. If your child demands for any sweet treats before meal time, just give a firm no or ask them to have their meal first and if they create ruckus, just don’t pay attention. Ignoring them in such situation can make children more aware of their behaviour and they won’t throw unnecessary tantrums for getting parent’s attention. 

8. Teach With Examples

Kids tend to embarrass in front of the public and this is one of the most common reasons why parents resort to spanking. When you go out with your toddler, explain them how other people think of children who misbehave with their parents in public. Your toddler will gradually understand your point.

9. Use Their Technique To Change Their Behaviour

This works when performed with perfection. If your toddler is getting too fussy and is constantly denying what you want them to do, then tell them that you too would refuse to do something they want. If your child is angrily misbehaving for having chocolate or biscuits, then tell them that only a change in their behaviour can convince you to give them those treats. This method is a bit controversial but if you politely give it a try and it works, then this is the best way to teach them the value of good behaviour.

10. Involve Them In Your Routine Activities

Toddlers are bundle of energies and when they don’t find ways to release those energy, they get bored and hence, then feel like throwing tantrums. So the best way is to encourage good behaviour and help them utilise this energy to everyone’s benefit. You, as a parent, must allocate specific tasks to them on regular basis. Ask them to keep their toys and stuff in their respective places, ask for their assistance in cleaning, cooking, gardening, etc. Use their energies in constructive manner.

You may like this

• Five Ways to Keep Your Kids Safe as They Go Out Into the World
• What are the Positive Impacts of Gaming on Children
• 5 Things You Can Do to Be a More Eco-friendly Parent